HPKCC Schools Committee Prospectus for an assets-building program and coalition for the Hyde Park-Kenwood area, and going beyond into ("promises kids-zone neighborhood")
Return to Schools Committee home
Visit a similar but more vast idea, "Promise Neighborhoods" geared to poverty issues, being touted for troubled neighborhoods near us. See also Community Schools, UC Schools Research, Defining Excellence. How to Walk to School.
And read about our conclave of in-school partners and out-of-school program providers.
Visit our portal to Youth Programs Databases.
From the July 2009 Reporter - Developmental Assets Program Outlined by Schools Committee (by Nancy Baum)
From October 22 2009 Schools Committee discussion on this matter, and moving beyond assets. And focus discussion
Search Institute 40 Assets program
September 28, Wednesday, 6 pm. Friends of Blackstone Library and others present this season's first Despres Family Lecture. Jacqueline Edelberg, school turnaround expert, on her book "How to Walk to School, Bluebpint for a Neighborhood School Renaissance" with a panel that includes leaders of Friends of Ray School and Friends of Shoesmith. The evening will be moderated by Alysia Tate, COO of the Community Renewal Society. Formerly the editor and publisher of The Chicago Reporter, Tate is most recognized from her appearances on WTTW’s Chicago Tonight. 4904 S. Lake Park.
October 6, Thursday, 6 pm. Education and Engagement Community Forum. A Poverty, Promise, Possibility program of Civic Knowledge UC. At SSA, 969 E. 60th St.
Eye on Neighborhood Schools: Developmental Assets Program Outlined by Schools Committee
From the July 2009 Conference Reporter. By Nancy Baum
There are, according to the Minneapolis-based Search Institute, 40 different kinds of experiences, relationships, opportunities and personal qualities that children need to have in order to succeed in life. These experiences include exposure to the arts and performance of volunteer work, etc. The Schools Committee of the Hyde Park-Kenwood Community Conference is proposing that a coalition of parents, teachers, community organizations and churches be built in order to help shepherd the students in our neighborhood along. Whatever experiences are not being provided will ultimately be provided. To this end, a staff person will be hired to maintain communications and to coordinate the program that would be established.
After-school programs tend to peter out after age 12. Few want to deal with children that are older. Indeed, Canter Middle School was an outgrowth of the sensed community need for a special school for this transitional age group. Schools and community might do better if they knew what types of experiences children need or are lacking. Our schools are places where parents need to feel more comfortable about sending their children. A child from Kozminski might know about the Hyde Park Art Center, but since it is on the other side of Hyde Park, might not choose to go there. The access to programs for children is uneven.
Some suggested activities are Junior Achievement, Junior Great Books, Café Society, ecology movements, city gardening, etc. Kids would be invited to participate in different organizations. How do we go about selling the idea to parents?
In search of a model for a program that might be doable in Hyde Park, four members of the Hyde Park-Kenwood Community Conference Schools Committee, Gary Ossewaarde, the Rev. Larry Turpin, Ismail Turay and Nancy Baum, met with Ida Lynn Wenhold, the executive director of “Kids Matter” in Naperville on March 3, 2009. Ida Lynn explained that the program in Naperville came at the impetus of Edwards Hospital, the local hospital in Naperville. Edwards noticed that many of their adolescent patients were showing signs of abuse and neglect and wanted to do something about it. A Developmental Assets Profile Survey, an abbreviated 15-minute survey, revealed that, though there was a lot of parental support, family communication was poor and service to the community was low. The Profile Survey can be viewed online at www.search-institute.org. A three-pronged approach was conceived in order to reach the community: 1) Programming, 2) Asset Education and 3) Coalition Building.
Programs were developed in giving service to the community, through a Volunteer Fair and obtaining jobs through a Job Fair. Of course, eventually, fund raising became a major undertaking because of all the publicity and materials that were needed to get the word out to the community. Funds came from Chicago United Way, Chicago Trust, Kiwanis, Chamber of Commerce, and from businesses. Coalition-building took place among schools, police, counseling centers, etc. A tracking system was put into place.
How were parents taught about Assets Education? Parents got information to read. A publication called “E Blast” was given to schools to put into their newsletters. Assets Tips and Assets Bingo were created. Printed material was gotten into peoples’ hands by kiosks set up at store cash registers, placing into magazines and newspapers, etc. Businesses were approached to come up with ideas to make children feel more welcome. School resource officers and social workers helped with materials distribution. Other ideas are to get college students to come to schools campuses to talk about college or even become big brothers and big sisters. A special program for girls was established called WINGS. An Equal Opportunity Award was established by the mayor’s office to honor some ordinary kid, perhaps someone who volunteered to clean the streets. Table toppers with family trivia topics were placed on tables in restaurants to get the conversation going.
Needless to say this was an exciting prospect, but decidedly a very large project. We of the Schools Committee have ideas about how to go about implementing a project like this, if needed. To establish need we would like to distribute the 15-minute survey to all students ages 12-19 in Hyde Park. We would need the participation of the principals of all the schools in the neighborhood. Then, once the data were analyzed and needs identified the idea would have to be sold to the community and initial funds would have to be found. We have huge resources available in this community: that could lend full weight to the Community Conference to move forward on this. The Conference has already pulled together a data base of programs available to our youth. It can be found on www.hydepark.org/schools. Rep. Currie and Alderman Preckwinkle’s offices put out an annual booklet listing schools and programs for children.
In addition to finding out what children’s emotional needs are vis a vis the community, the schools have material needs that must be met. But this is a question for another time.
From the October 22, 2009 HPKCC Schools Committee meeting discussion of these topics
From the minutes of the October 22, 2009 HPKCC Schools Committee
Rudy Nimocks spoke about the the Harlem Children Zone mentorship Program that takes children from infancy to college. This program is being carried out in 10 communities nationwide as needing the benefit of such a program.. Its 100-page report is on the internet. The Woodlawn area has a committee that is trying to apply this concept to Woodlawn along with Bishop Brazier.
[A federally selected] neighborhood gets 5 million dollars that must be matched by other sources of money. If it works well in the Woodlawn area as a pilot, From Cradle to College will spread over the country, says Nimocks. It will attempt to replicate what is being done in Harlem. The program includes a holistic approach, meaning services are available in one place: mentoring, tutoring, etc. on premises. Children who are not in the promise zone are referred out to other agencies, but without any follow-up discernable. [In Harlem, they do not have "magnet", "neighborhood" etc. schools--the resources and students are evenly distributed and the schools are true community and service providing centers, vs Chicago.]
[What do we have in Chicago or locally, and what might we want?]
Everyone agreed that adult role models are important. The Search Institute identifies 40 assets in 2 categories: External Assets and Internal Assets. They include engaging adults, activating sectors, invigorating programs, influencing civic decisions and mobilizing young people.
[N]oted Kenwood’s After-School program is funded with $16 million dollars. After School Matters is chaired by Maggie Daley. Kids are paid $500 to be in the program. One example of things they do is to have a group make a demo tape with music, dancing, singing, choir, etc. [Outside of ASM there is little offered.]
[M]entioned[:] working with schools to get more services, a tutor-mentor connection. Daniel Basill of the 4th Presbyterian Church runs such a program There is a web site for mapping tutoring opportunities in the city in order to connect services to needs.
The example of Spry Community Academy in Little Village was mentioned: The school is now pre-K through H.S.
PACs, Parent Advisory Councils, are funded through the CPS for volunteer work, but not all schools have PACs.
Kenwood also has free classes funded by $8000.00.
HPAC: Hyde Park Art Center. All schools participate in this organization. Little Black Pear also has program.
Reavis has a clinic with a full-time nurse and has instituted a parent program.
Kozminski is a 1-8 school.
Ray has 2 pre-schools, one half-day and one whole-day. Price and Shoesmith have instituted pre-schools. [It was noted that after preschool chances for many children go down and they never catch up.]
Someone asked what happens to the kids who move away and out of the school?
Murray is [an example of] a stable [and high performing] school [-it is a magnet school].
The group the Schools Committee wants to focus on is the Middle School. Ages 12-18 are usually considered too old for after-school programs [and c 9th grade is where many pupils don't adjust and really start to fall behind]. For children that age not much is available without paying and the children must be chauffeured to that place. Suggested activities include: Girl Scouts. Sports, drama. Rudy mentioned a University Art Complex in the Woodlawn area. Ratner Gym has programs but the membership is expensive.
There is an organization with program to connect with retired music teachers for free. Children’s hip-hop music and colorful language today may not match their interests.
The Neighborhood Club teaches banking skills.
The Little Black Pearl and the YMCA have programs.
Kenwood used to have free classes but not anymore.
City: Resources Directory for children: Steve Brown, sociologist, Hospitals give mothers web-sites to check.
Resources from the outside can be plugged in but must deal with school bureaucracies.
Woodlawn Social Services Network lists 12-13 organizations that all go in different directions, including inter-faith groups. There is no umbrella group.
[A] Health Fair was held recently at 63rd and Ingleside
The group considered where they might try to place their efforts. Our original thought was to work with Canter School and Colleen Conlan, the principal. The Committee must put together a program proposal: Rudy Nimocks suggested older read to younger. Carnegie School has such a program [and Ray?] .Someone mentioned that Bret Harte has a hi-rise building being built next to it and there might be a possibility there.
The Schools Committee will continue to try to meet with people from the University and elsewhere and we consider what resources the community can bring to bear, what kind of collaborative the Committee wants to commit to.
Nancy passed around copies of the Survey for Students. [Mr. Nimocks will seek a meeting with UC persons who can advise.]
[Nancy included in her report links to some studies from Chapin Hall that might be of help from Chapin Hall: evaluating After School Matters, How Active are Teens, and Adults and Bullying: Go to http://www.about.chapinhall.org/research/areas/Youth%20Development%20and%20Afterschool%20Initiatives.]
Focusing the possible HPKCC Schools Committee role in promoting asset-development and a more comprehensive approach to child development in greater Hyde Park and Kenwood public schools
By Gary Ossewaarde
The following draws upon on a discussion with Rudy Nimocks, UC Director of Community Partnerships, including member comments, at the HPKCC Schools Committee meeting October 22, 2009. It is not minutes. It is a focus interpretation by Gary Ossewaarde.
The Harlem Kids Zone program is about 25 years old. It depends on enrollment of families and on continuous fundraising and is in a school system that is run directly by the city of New York. The school system does not have different kinds of schools such as magnet--and perhaps because of this parents don't send the "best" kids to one set of schools, usually at a distance while shunning "neighborhood" schools, sticking the later with the rest of the students as in Chicago. The Kids Zone program is in all schools in Harlem and its key is that the schools are real community, activity and service centers providing a holistic approach for students and families. Teacher accountability and all around assessment is strong. 97 percent of graduates in this low-income, underserved neighborhood go to college.
The Woodlawn Initiative has done a feasibility and attributes-of-envisioned-program study, by University of Chicago, and U of C and committee members have visited key players in Washington to ascertain what the U.S. Department of Education will want in a program and proposal for replicated promise zones, in response to the federal RFP that is due out in December 2009. As envisioned in Washington, each Zone or pilot area would get 5 million a year over 5 years, which has to be matched (apparently feasible according to feelers). The idea is that the program be scalable and capable of expansion to other neighborhoods. Specific programs are to be innovative, capture minds, and serve the whole person. CPS appears supportive of this and similar proposals from other parts of the city. The Woodlawn COMMITTEE WROTE A 100 PAGE REPORT. This committee is led by Bishop Brazier and Prof. Charles Payne. Others include Rudy Nimocks, Duel Richardson, Wallace Goode from UC, neighborhood leaders, and of course CPS staff. (Note that this initiative is separate from those of LISC/New Communities.) Focus subcommittees include safety, education, health/nutrition, and other services that the community would have in the schools as well as academics and student experiences/exposures.
A big obstacle is working around the fact that most potential partner programmers and services tend to go in separate directions and compete rather than coordinate with each other or parcel programs or territories. Second, Chicago schools are not geared to be holistic service centers-- kids and families needing help tend to be "referred" to services or programs, with little CPS or other follow up and little in-house health, social or counseling services [the model on the East Coast?] and that there is often (vs. Harlem schools) little real coordination within schools between various academic departments and with staff-services such as counseling. A third problem is funding, including that only half of the education money is said to go to things that directly interface with the child in CPS schools. Fourth, after age 12: the programs drop off, they appear to be less accessible (kids have to be taken there), and there is a drop off of interest on the part of many youth, who have a big agenda whose social needs, at least as they see them, may not mesh with current structured programs. A fifth problem is cost of programs--not only high cost but that little in or out of school is free. Sixth, leadership at each school varies greatly, plus unions are sometimes unsupportive of programs not by their members or that require a lengthened teacher day or load without added compensation.
Current models and initial needed knowledge and initial conditions
Area schools holding promise. One school that does model an encompassing, preschool-high school program like a promise school is Spy(e?) Community Academy. Reavis School is modeling a similar approach, including both a big funded pilot project focusing inter alia on a parent development center and programs and an in-house nurse funded by Quad Communities. Kozminski has moved a fair distance that way, including year-round and longer hours program. The following have preschools: Ray, Price, Shoesmith. Murray is a stable, diverse, high-performing school- it’s a magnet but also has lots of testing and evaluation/assessment, teacher accountability, and parental involvement. In King High, in-school coordination and convergence upon getting each child the help they need were said to be effective.
Naperville has a Kids Matter program that spreads the services and experiences over many kinds of institutions, programs and places, not just in schools, and has a large variety of program based actions including job and volunteer fairs and matching and community service hours. It also has strong newsletters in the community and has an input in school newsletters that get shared, and puts conversation-starters for example in restaurants. Note that this program, like Promise Zone, started from observation that many kids were being abused or socially and health-wise neglected.
Brought up is the importance of conducting a reliable assessment of needs and the extent to which these needs are being met and what various schools are actually doing now.
Another need suggested is to get the providers including health and service to programs into area or broader collaboratives. What would the goal or focus of such a collaborative be?
Another approach to finding some of the answers and building buy-in and support suggested was to just start doing something perhaps in one receptive school (Canter?) or a set of grades/ages, such as the schools that are middle schools and/or have 7th and 8th grades, or a 6th grade that is promising for one or another reason).
An alternative was starting with pre-K because at some point there needs to be longitudinal study through grade progression of what is being implemented, what's working, and results.
Members pointed out that whatever one does, the organization has to stay involved and make sure its goals are at least being served, and not just develop something and turn it over to another.
Another approach suggested is supporting volunteer groups that provide services/activities in schools, such as reading to kids (not mentioned at this meeting: Real Men Read, one that goes into schools).
What else do we have here already that can be built upon?
After School Matters [contacts and description in the database documents in hydepark.org/schools] is among the largest and strongest such broad target program in the country, but after that resources are scarce and uneven—as ASM is also. After School Matters has $16 million in 59 locations, many other than schools. The hub is Gallery 37. Kids get paid to work with outside program providers (such as for making a demo tape as at Kenwood) and this sometimes draws students away from standard programs such as choir or band. After School Matters is only in Kenwood (not Canter).
Another is Tutor Mentor Connection. It provides, inter alia, maps matching tutors and needs in every part of the city. Head is Daniel Bassill, http://www.tutormentorconnection.org. Another example of a city-wide targeted-need program mentioned was Gear Up for progressing through high school, getting into and graduating from college.
A Resource Directory has been developed by Steve Brown. It surveys the service and health providers of the whole southeast quadrant of the city. Woodlawn has a Woodlawn Social Service Network that was said not to be getting full bang for the buck, but the AKA Sorority service center was said to be-- could these and others be brought together? There is a Kenwood Social Service Network. Nothing in Hyde Park? [U of C leads a more limited Urban Health Collaborative but is starting a broader survey of broad-health related resources-- for a smaller area than Brown's?]
PAC programs are working to leverage parental involvement and volunteering. It's especially strong in North Kenwood. Kenwood Academy’s PAC brings in speakers for parents, such as the head of the local health department. Along that line, there was agreement that schools and the community have to reach out to and treat every kid in a school and their parents as THEIRS, whether they come from the area or not-- and conversely, some schools may need to be approached about the impression they discourage locals kids from applying. A harder problem was thought to be getting parents to send their children to even the best schools near home, let along having all area schools be such that parents would eagerly send their kids there, an long-term desire of the Schools Committee. And there were said to be just a few good schools and a ton of bad schools-- how much of this is a vicious circle, how much due to magnet emphasis or limited and unevenly distributed funds.
So the options for Schools Committee were thought to include:
1. Pick a school or age group. Canter is interested in our help, has a need and age group the committee is interested in, takes students from several local elementary schools, [and is getting physical help from TIF], but has the drawback in the kind of help that might be given in having many students from out of area. Harte also seems interested in us and has real and potential partners/funders but could use more. Kenwood, in a similar condition, is also is interested in us- ditto to Harte. All of these schools have aspects or divisions that excel and others that are in the middle among area schools, with potential to raise their bar. (It was also noted that these schools were among those that most consistently come to our networking dinners.)
2. Do an assessment/survey of assets needs and current program/successes maybe in a couple of schools. (Find out if this is needed first!)
3. Identify what resources the community can bring to bear on one or more of the above or in a school, and garner them along with "community support". (Implicitly from discussion: promote in some way an "assets-building" program and/or seed the start of something like what is envisioned in the Woodlawn Initiative for the greater Hyde Park and Kenwood schools).
4. Bring volunteers to work in schools (difficulties were noted including varying degrees of reception from schools).
(Thought to be well beyond our means: turning a school around).
[Not discussed: whether the committee buys into the comprehensive/holistic approach to schools as more than schoolhouses but community centers. Also, relationship of the four foregoing options to our other mission of nurturing and serving as resource to Local Schools Councils. Note: the expansive vision that Woodlawn Initiative represent fits mission of the Conference in that HPKCC seeks communities in which people wish to live and can—attractive, caring, diverse, and secure. But the focus of the Schools Committee is “good education” for all students with good life outcomes. If the broader goal is embraced, one likely need is expansion of current or creation of additional online youth and family resource databases and their dissemination.- GO]
Governing constraint in decision and execution: What we can direct to schools, and how will depend in part on finding a workable feedback loop:
1) principals who will buy in and give us their needs and preferred general task that mesh with our goals and abilities,
2) a program to determine, gather and direct resources in ways that fit our and schools' goals (and give bang for the buck and effort).
The committee will pick its priorities and develop short and long-term actions. Leaders will continue to find studies and reports that help us in this. Leaders will meet with potential advisors, including with help from Rudy.
Search Institute 40-Developmental Assets program
Contact the Search Institute at 615 First Ave. NE Ste 125, Minneapolis, MN, 877 240-7251 x1, www.search-institute.org, look also there for hc-hy (Healthy Communities-Healthy Youth.
Search-Institute's American- National Promises Study of how American youth are faring in getting the needed life-skill sets, "Every Child, Every Promise." Visit also Promise Zones, Assets-building proposal.
See also in related pages: Portal to youth program/provider databases,
Schools Committee's Assets-Building idea. Promise Neighborhoods Programs.
Below to the "Building Assets" 40 assets/skills for adulthood.
Web link to the Study and surveys: http://www.search-institute.org/system/files/IE-Dec06-APStudy.pdf.
A survey based on research findings including by Dr. John Heckman of the University of Chicago was formulated and run by The Gallop Organization as a 15 minute survey, and the results were parsed by age and demographics (with corrections for undercounts).
The 5 "Promises" or global conditions and prerequisites for success are:
- having caring adults around
- having safe places and constructive use of time
- general health and healthy development
- effective use of marketable skills and engaging in lifelong learning
- tries to make a difference by helping others
These in turn are evaluated for translations or further realizations in, for example good grades, avoidance of substance abuse and unsafe sex, volunteering experience, sense they are thriving and have control (See the "assets", below.)
Assets can empower, but only a minority give evidence that most or all the promises to them are fulfilled (but these give clues to what works). Experience is often very uneven--strong in one promise or skill but weak in others. A slight majority have overall positive outcomes. There is a strong problem of equality. A child's best "chance" is to be a 6-7 year old girl who is white and from an affluent, well-educated family.
"Building Assets": 40 assets children need to master to become successful adults
The Search Institute encourages a one-on-one approach with youth and has identified and categorized 40 needed assets. These were assigned to 8 developmental areas, and each was surveyed, revealing a very wide disparity between acquisition of related assets, strong correlation between the number of assets acquired and positive behaviors and attitudes (specifically exhibiting leadership, maintaining good health, valuing diversity, and succeeding in school--the weakest correlation, though) and avoidance of high-risk behavior (alcohol, violence, drugs, sexual activity). Only 8 percent have the benchmark 31 of 40, more than half have 20 or fewer. The lack of assets is spread quite evenly over gender, grade, and geography. The need for communication and real dialogue comes out clearly, as it does in Dawoud Bey's new book of teen photos and views, Class Pictures-- a parent of teens must reading.
Categories. The first 4 are external, dealing with structures, relationships, and activities that create a positive environment:
- Support: Young people need to be surrounded by people who love, care for, appreciate and accept them.
- Empowerment: ...need to feel valued and valuable, safe and respected.
- Boundaries and expectations: ..need clear rules, consistent consequences, and encouragement to do best.
- Constructive use of time: ...need opportunities in and out of school to learn and develop new skills and interests with other youth and adults.
The next four categories reflect internal values, skills, and beliefs to function in the world.
- Commitment to learning. A sense of the lasting importance of learning, belief in own abilities.
- Positive values. Strong guiding values, principles for healthy life choices.
- Social competencies. Skills to interact effectively with others, make difficult decisions, cope with the new.
- Positive identity. .. believe in their own self-worth and feel they have control over what happens to them.
Here are the assets by category (weak=30% or less perceive it, strong=over 47% do)
1. Family support (very strong)
2. Positive family communication (weak)
3. Other adult relationships-- 3 or more non parent adults
4. Caring neighborhood
5. Caring school climate (weak)
6. Parent involvement in schooling (weak)
7. Community values youth
8. Youth used as resources (weak)
9. Service to others (hour or more per week) (strong)
10. Safety (at home, at school, in neighborhood)
Boundaries and Expectations
11. Family boundaries- clear rules and consequences and monitors whereabouts (strong)
12. School boundaries (strong)
13. Neighborhood boundaries- neighbors monitor youth behavior (strong)
14. Adult role models (weak)
15. Positive peer influence (very strong)
16. High expectations (strong)
Constructive use of time
17. Creative activities (3 or more hours per week) (weak)
18. Youth programs (3 or more hour per week) (strong)
19. Religious community (one or more hours per week) (strong)
20. Time at home (out with friends doing nothing 2 or fewer hours) (strong)
Commitment to learning
21. Achievement motivation (very strong)
22. School engagement (strong)
23. Homework (at least an hour a day) (strong)
24. Bonding to school (strong)
25. Reading for pleasure (3 or more hours a week) (weak)
26. Caring (strong)
27. Equality and social justice (strong)
28. Integrity (acts on convictions and stands up for beliefs) (very strong)
29. Honesty (even when it's not easy) (very strong)
30. Responsibility (accepts and takes) (very strong)
31. Restraint (important to be not sexually active, use alcohol or drugs)
32. Planning and decision making (weak)
33. Interpersonal competence (empathy, sensitivity, friendship skills)
34. Cultural competence (with people of different backgrounds)
35. Resistance skills
36. Peaceful conflict resolution
37. Personal power
38. Self-esteem (strong)
39. Sense of purpose (strong)
40. Positive view of personal future (very strong)
Making a difference for kids
Who in your childhood or youth helped you in a special way to learn or have positive experiences? You can be that person for a child. What you do makes a difference in kids' lives.
You don't have to be the parent, or a trained professional, charming, or have lots of time or money.
You can... Show care, support and love, help them know they belong
Empower-- show they they are safe, give them ways they can serve and be of value
Set boundaries and high expectations (but you have to be an example!)
Guide to activities that make constructive use of time including arts/performance, sports, hobbies, faith involvement, and at home
Grow a lifelong commitment to learning-- including reading and learning with them, challenge them and yourself also
Instill positive values and self-governance-- help them ask the right questions
Give social competency opportunities, including to be respectful and kind
A strong identity matters-- this is hard to instill without giving and modeling unconditional love and a life with purpose and optimism.
What's the payoff? Children have positive attitudes, skills, abilities,
Teens make wise choices and avoid risky business,
Families work together and become proactive,
Adults gain new friends and activities,
Businesses etc. find ways to show community commitment.
So, how can you start and have your own 40 assets?
1. Ask youth what they are passionate about
2. Start traditions
3. Share experiences like each picking music, listening and telling why you chose it
4. Ask the young person to teach YOU a new skill
5. Send children milestone cards
6. Garden together
7. Hold a school-year tied block party, invite teachers etc.
8. Report bullying and other threats to kids
9. Put kids in charge-- for example a meal, packing, a party
10. Be patient with youth in a store or workplace
11. Solicit input in decisions
12. Organize a closet cleaning and together give to a shelter or thrift shop
13. Ask kids where they are going, with whom, and when they'll be back
14. Offer praise to other parents as much as possible when a kid does something responsible, kind
15. Ask children to read to YOU, be proud and excited when they do
16. Be prompt to say "I'm sorry"
17. Teach a hobby or skill
18. Look for positive outlets for their creative energy
19. Mentor or tutor
20. Talk about their religious views, help them to clarify their views
21. Make sure time at home is meaningful, with some meals as family time (If you teach, skip assigning for at least one day a week)
22. Limit time with TV, computers, video games; encourage to do active things
23. Talk about school and learning, including what they wish could be changed
24. Show pride in the school(s) through clothing for example
25. Bring a kid along to garage sales to look for BOOKS
26. Stress learning for life and lifetime learning, not just grades or graduation
27. Talk about people who work or have worked for social justice
28. Point it out to the kids when you see dishonest practices, including by businesses, and discuss whys and impacts
29. Let kids learn from mistakes
30. Discuss the cost of what you buy and let them help them make the choices
31. Do talk about drugs, alcohol, sexuality and give values and expectations
32. Coach to plan ahead-- ask "what if"
33. Put kids in charge of planning and carrying out a whole event sometimes
34. Invite a kid or youth along on outings
35. Affirm teens when they choose right-- they need to hear they are right
36. Have lots of books about heroes
37. Tell once in a while about a time you messed up and what you learned from the experience
38. Respect teens' privacy, but take interest in their friends and activities
39. Ask kids about goals and dreams, and what resources and means they will need to get there
40. Vow to say one encouraging thing to a young person EVERY DAY